Dyslexia and dyscalculia are both part of a ‘family’ of conditions known as specific learning difficulties. Dyscalculia is a persistent and specific difficulty in understanding numbers. Dyslexia, despite the name and the common perception that it is all about words, is actually about how information is processed within the brain. It therefore affects the ability to take in and remember information. It may show as difficulty reading or understanding information, but also in processing languages or mathematical concepts.

Children with dyslexia and dyscalculia generally start to experience problems from a very early stage. Even those diagnosed late (after they go to secondary school) have often shown signs of their condition much earlier. They may therefore have needed more help and support at school and with schoolwork than many of their peers. The problems also do not simply ‘go away’ on diagnosis. Children tend to turn to their parents for help, which often means a steep learning curve for those parents.

This page explains more about how parents can help and support children with specific learning difficulties, especially dyslexia and dyscalculia.

The Role of Parents of Children with Specific Learning Difficulties

As the parent of a child with a specific learning difficulty such as dyslexia or dyscalculia, your main role is to advocate for them until they are able to advocate for themselves—or when their own advocacy fails.

Your second role is to facilitate the provision of any additional support they need for their learning.

The precise needs are likely to vary between children, and it is wise to allow them to identify where and how they need help. You may be able to provide this help yourself, or you may need to involve others—a tutor, perhaps, or your child’s school.

It is worth being aware that this need for help may go on much longer than you might expect. At times of particular stress—for example, preparing for public exams, or doing assessed coursework—they may need much more support than their peers. That support might just be ‘moral support’, and knowing that you are there, and thinking about them.

However, they may also need practical help with understanding instructions for coursework, or thinking through how to revise, even if they have previously been able to manage both these things. Their ability to advocate for themselves may also regress under pressure, so building a good relationship with their school, and knowing where to obtain additional support, is essential.

There are also some specific ways that parents can help, both before and after diagnosis.

Before Diagnosis

Children with dyslexia and dyscalculia may need additional help and support long before any kind of formal diagnosis is mentioned.

Indeed, this may be one of the first signs of a specific learning difficulty.

Schools tend to use standard systems and processes for teaching, especially for reading, writing and basic mathematics. Most neurotypical children pick up reading and mathematical concepts relatively easily using these systems. When a child does not do so, or struggles with one particular area while easily managing others, this may be a sign of an underlying specific learning difficulty.

Our page on Understanding Dyslexia explains some of the signs and issues that may be present at different ages.

One of the most important ways that parents can support children with specific learning difficulties is to be alert for these signs. This is especially true if there are other people with similar difficulties in your extended family.

Schools and teachers often have limited experience of dyslexia and dyscalculia, and especially with some of the rarer manifestations. It is not necessarily the first thing that springs to their minds when a child is struggling with schoolwork. They may instead write children off as ‘stupid’ or ‘not trying’, rather than look for other explanations of their difficulty.

Do not underestimate the effect of this on your child. If they are trying really hard, but still ‘cannot do’ something that all their peers are managing, this is extremely demoralising. If their teachers then seem to be suggesting that they are not trying, this is even worse, because it feels like nobody is listening to them or that they are somehow defective and ‘should’ be able to manage.

It is therefore not helpful to rely on your child’s school to identify a problem.

If you think that your child may have a specific learning difficulty, raise it with their school. In the UK, schools are required to have a Special Educational Needs Coordinator (SENCo), who should be open to a conversation about  your child.

It may be worth suggesting a professional assessment, preferably via the SENCo. However, if the school is reluctant, you can get a private assessment. Charities like the British Dyslexia Association and PATOSS (the Professional Association of Teachers of Students with Specific Learning Difficulties) can provide lists of qualified assessors. This may be expensive, which is why going through the school is best if it is possible.

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After Diagnosis

After diagnosis, your main job as a parent is to help your child get the support that they need, through their school.

In the UK at least, local councils and schools are required to ensure that they make accommodations for children with special educational needs. There are two possible ways in which this may be done.

The school may draw up an Individual Education Plan (IEP).

This sets out how the school will meet the child’s educational needs. It may include aspects like teachers checking that the child has written down their homework, as well as the use of laptops or extra time in exams.

This approach is often used if the school can meet the child’s needs without external support. It is not legally binding. However, it is agreed between the school and the parents, and therefore usually supported by both. Parents, children and teachers can suggest or request additions or amendments to the IEP to reflect what they know about the child and their needs.

Getting your child’s needs and the supporting accommodations clearly set out in their IEP is therefore the first step to ensuring that those needs can be met.

Of course, if accommodations are not being made as agreed, then you will need to have a conversation with the SENCo—and keep doing so until your child has the support that they need in place.

The council may draw up an Education, Health and Care Plan (EHCP).

This sets out the child’s special educational needs and how the council will support them, including through schools and other support. This is legally binding, and therefore much more formal than an IEP. It tends to be used where the school is unable to meet the child’s needs without help, or where it has already failed to make the necessary accommodations.

An IEP is the most likely response from a school following a diagnosis of a specific learning difficulty. However, bearing in mind that many children with dyslexia and dyscalculia also have other issues such as attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) or autism, an EHCP may be (or become) necessary.

The Most Important Action?

Perhaps the most important thing that you can do when you have a child with a specific learning difficulty is to keep talking to your child about their learning.

Know what is going on, where they are struggling, which teachers are supportive and so on. This will enable you to identify potential issues, and start to address them early. You can also see when you may need to involve others, such as an external tutor, or seek out further resources.

This is another reason to ensure that you have a good relationship with the SENCo and other pastoral staff at your child’s school. It is far better to be contingency planning than dealing with a crisis.

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